Archive for September, 2012


You Surpass Them All

Jim Carey once said, “Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” I’m sure every wife can relate to this to some degree. I remember reading an interview with Helena Bonham Carter where she was asked what it was like living with such a genius filmmaker, Tim Burton. She said she didn’t find his genius too intimidating, because he couldn’t seem to pick up his dirty underwear off the floor.

When I was sixteen-years-old and became interested in a cute girl named Tracy Lucia, I truly was struck by her beauty. However, it was her character that caused me to pursue her doggedly until she agreed to marry me six years later. She had qualities that I lacked, but was determined to have: confidence, leadership ability, and an intense passion for God. Frankly, I wanted to be like her. I still do.

When Tracy was fourteen I saw her discipling other junior high students in our church, at fifteen running our teen summer camp, at sixteen running a Bible club at her school and fearlessly doing street evangelism alone on the streets of downtown Dallas.

After many years of dating, I tricked her into marrying me. Although I had no job at the time, but plenty of ambition, she chose me. When I got my first full-time job as a youth pastor, she was my mentor. I was nerve wracked and socially inept. She was a born leader and extrovert. Man, had I picked the right girl! Together as a team we followed our dreams.

A wife of noble character who can find?

She is worth far more than rubies.

Her husband has full confidence in her

and lacks nothing of value.

Proverbs 31:10,11

Tracy is the kind of Proverbs 31 woman who loves those who are looked over, those who are different or even outcasts. If someone is different or doesn’t “fit in”, she makes them feel special. Together Tracy and I started a church for the homeless and a school of urban ministry where she trained many others in how to minister to the poor. She mentors other women in motherhood and wifehood. She even has her own show that gives great advice on YouTube: More importantly, she gives me wise counsel. Although I don’t acknowledge this to her enough, the advice she gives me is usually right on the money. She has played a strong part in every success I have ever had.

She speaks with wisdom,

and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

Proverbs 31:26

Tracy takes care of the poor and elderly, driving neighbors to doctor’s appointments. One time I witnessed her cleaning up and bandaging a bloody, wounded homeless, drug addicted man who had asked her for help. In a world of HIV and AIDS, this was nothing less than courageous (No, she was not infected). Each year Tracy takes the initiative in making sure that our family gives to the needy through sponsor children and special Christmas giving.

She opens her arms to the poor

and extends her hands to the needy.

Proverbs 31:20

Behind the scenes, She nurtures and cares for our family allowing me to work a full-time missionary position serving the homeless in New York and New Jersey. I get all the glory while behind the scenes, she is the one encouraging me and holding me up when I bottom out. She pinches pennies, looks for deals and saves our money to make sure that we are prepared for dry seasons.

She watches over the affairs of her household

and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Proverbs 31:27

To have a wife who knows all of your bad sides in detail and continues to love, support and sacrifice for you is truly a priceless treasure. It is the epitome of grace: undeserved favor. Over almost twenty years in our marriage we had times of turmoil, challenge and stress, but Tracy never considered divorcing me. I have had several Christian buddies over the years who weren’t so fortunate. With a woman like Tracy by my side I am able to go for broke and risk failure knowing that she stands with me no matter what goes down.

Coming up on our twenty year anniversary in November, I can still honestly say that I still want to be like Tracy. Marrying her was the best decision I ever made. No matter what happens in life, as long as I have her I count myself a very rich man. There are plenty of great ladies out there, but as far as I’m concerned Tracy surpasses them all. (And she’s hot too!)

Her children arise and call her blessed;

her husband also, and he praises her:

“Many women do noble things,

but you surpass them all.”

Proverbs 31:28,29

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